Changing Lanes

As 2014 closes, I join millions of people in reflecting on the past year, evaluating my choices over the past year, and making new ones where appropriate.

It's been quite the journey for me, and I've talked about it in previous posts. As I thought about the year, the image of driving a vehicle, especially navigating in unfamiliar territory (perhaps in a strange city) came to my mind - and since I had recently finished watching Season 10 of "Canada's Worst Driver" ... I fixated on lane changes - something that still makes me nervous - as a comparison to the Christian life. 

Like driving, life involves making one choice after another; each one will affect the direction or the speed. I believe that there are a few lessons about driving a vehicle that apply to the choices each of us makes in life, lessons that determine where we go, how fast we get there, and whether we will arrive in one piece. 

On a trip, often there are very few places where we can stop and just turn around. Frequently, we have to make a series of adjustments that involve a very specific skill: changing lanes. This is a very versatile skill. It helps us safely navigate off-ramps, merges, and turning lanes. 

So with that metaphor in mind, here are a few thoughts about changing lanes, which is the first step toward getting where we want to go:

Know where we've been, where we are and where we want to go. Sometimes when we've been travelling in one direction for quite some time, it's hard to be objective about what's been working ... and if our stated destination is really where we want to go. For example, if we've been of the opinion that we need to be at the church building every time the doors are open, attending every meeting, being involved in every ministry, we may not see the fact that we've been spreading ourselves too thinly and we are headed for burnout. We need to discover exactly what God has called us to do, and then do that. This might mean we'll have to give up some things we committed to doing because we thought we "should" ... or someone else thought we'd be good at ... or it was expected because of our job or our family connections. 

That will take some honest questions. It might take us some time; it might just require tuning into our spirits and asking for His guidance. However, it's worth the time it takes to refocus. The joy we may have been missing may be because we've been investing our time into areas to which we are not called. That can sap our energy and lead to a lot of frustration and even resentment.

Photo "Winding Road" by
pixbox77 at
www.freedigitalphotos.net

There is a common misunderstanding in the body of Christ, and that is that if a person is "good at" something, then that is his or her "gift."  And therefore, that is the niche he or she should hold in the church. The problem with that is that God rarely if ever uses someone in the area he or she is best at. His strength is made perfect in weakness. He does this to make it more likely that the person will rely on Him. My point in saying this is that we need to be careful to NOT make assumptions, and to listen carefully to what God is saying. If we ask Him honestly, He will find a way to show us what He wants.


Look for an opening. When we ask God to direct us into what He wants us to do, He will show us by pointing out a spot or a space for us.  If we are already in the place where He wants us, He will find a way to confirm that to us. However, it may be that He wants us to focus our energies on something else. If He does, He'll show us and we need to be expecting Him to do that. If it requires a "lane change", there are certain steps we need to take to ensure that nobody gets hurt (including ourselves):

• Use our mirrors to check the flow of traffic. We need to watch what the others are doing - not to challenge, criticize or copy them, but so as not to impede their progress in their own path. That way, there will be no collision, and the transition - if any - can take place smoothly.
  
• Check our own blind spot. This is where we can most easily get broadsided. It's our vulnerable place, where our wills and those of others can collide, so it's important to make sure that we know for sure that we don't jump the gun and change lanes too quickly, even if it means that we have to let someone else pass us. Even if we need to take a lower place, it's better to do that, and have God move us up, than to take a place of prominence and find ourselves unprepared.
  
• Slip into the spot God has opened up for us (easily, naturally, because if it's Him it will be!) and go with the flow... of the Spirit. Trying to do anything in our own strength is a sure recipe for disaster. And honestly, why would we even try? We have His grace and power to rely on, and He will work everything together for good - the greatest good ever: making us more and more like Jesus!! (see Romans 8:28, 29) 

Keep checking. It is easy to settle into a routine after we have been doing something for / with God for a while. We are tempted to coast: "Hey God, I think I got this, it's okay." The thing is, He IS the road. He IS the map. He IS everything! We need to keep reminding ourselves that He is our source at all times. And He hates being pegged; He never does the same thing the same way twice. So ... let's buckle up because He might decide to just switch things up and take us on an adventure we never expected!! 

Or, He just might ask us to pull over and take a rest from time to time.

We just never know. But that's okay. Because He does.

More

For as far back as I can remember, I've heard people pray for, beg for, plead for, even demand revival. I have even participated in such prayer. The longing of those in the church has been for a widescale revival like those ones in the past - the ones involving the Wesley brothers, or Charles Finney, or more modern ones like Pensacola. Folks pray, "Do it again, God!" ... and I hear their hearts.

I'm going to risk a lot of flak here but ... I don't pray like that anymore. I don't even pray for revival - at least, not in that sense. 

Every revival in history has been preceded by a period of such intense dryness that even some members of the church have given up - rightly calling what remains - the lifeless shell of organized religion - "Ichabod" - the glory has departed. 

Without fail, every revival in history has come about because there was at least one person, and no more than a handful of people, who started seeking God earnestly and asking Him one question: "Is this all there is? Is there more to the Christian life than what I've been taught?" 

I know one such person. And this person would agree that seeking God's reality, His personal presence, His heart, is what brings the dry bones back to life and ignites the fire of new life - or should I say REnewed life. 

For revival, you see, is not what most people think it is. People think of revival as being more people coming into the church and becoming Christians. 

IT ISN'T. 

Revival is coming to life AGAIN.  Otherwise it would just be VIVAL. 

Yes. Yes, revival is for the CHURCH. Believers begin to ask that question of God - they DARE to ask Him - "Is there more?" 

All those dry, dusty rules, traditions of men, that people have clung to for generations - is that all there is? All those efforts, praying, trying to make God do what we want Him to do by toeing the line and racking up brownie points (only to fall flat on our faces and hit our knees, but the heavens seem to be made of brass) ... all that going through the motions and singing this song, then that song, then the offering, then the sermon, then the closing finale ... 

Seriously God? is that all there is? 

All those hours upon hours of "doing devotions" ... grasping every little crumb that might fall to the floor for me ... is that how big You are God? really? All that time I've spent berating myself because I didn't measure up, promising to do better, begging You to show up in my life .... and .... nothing!! What is the deal, God? Are You there? DO You love me? Is Your presence and blessing in my life dependent on whether You are pleased with my lifestyle, my choices? if it is, then that's pretty pathetic because I know I can NEVER do enough to please You - You are satisfied with no less than perfection! 

So what is the deal, God? What is it I'm missing? What MORE is there?? 

[Notice - my readers - I switched from talking about US and HIM, and made it into a conversation between me and God - I used ME and YOU. I did that on purpose, to show that it HAS to be personal to be real. Let me continue.]

And then You start to reveal Yourself. Slowly, I realize something absolutely earth-shattering, just as it was the very first day of Grace, the day the earth split and the graves were opened, the day Jesus died for me. 

"More" has been there all along. I just never realized it! Your grace, by which I am saved and through which I entered this relationship, isn't just a "get out of jail free" card. It's a continual "not guilty" verdict, not just for the heinous acts of the past but also for every single time I ever do any less than perfect ... for the rest of my life. And this is all because of the all-sufficiency of Jesus' once-for-all sacrifice. For everyone who believes. For me.

Photo "Happy Jumping Child" by
chrisroll at
www.freedigitalphotos.net

Why? Why would You do that for me? How could You love me that much? If this rabbit-hole goes as deep as it looks like it goes, then You love me as much as You love Jesus!! You call me Your daughter! You have set Your (fiery, passionate) love upon me! I am (not just I have, but I am) Your righteousness because of Jesus! How high, how deep and how wide a love is that!?! 

Such gratitude! I am made whole, complete in You, forgiven, restored, accepted, loved! 

Along with those who have realized this greatest gift of "More" in its fulness, I can't help but rhapsodize about You! Thank You for putting those people into my life - I get together with them because it's the most natural thing in the world to me, not because I am "expected" to. 

We share with each other often about all the wonderful things You are, all the great and glorious things You are doing in our lives. We lift each other up. We lift YOU up. We worship You in the beauty of holiness, made right and righteous in Your sight, completely accepted in the Beloved One.

This is the core of revival; nothing more, nothing less. The joy and excitement that we have because of You spills out into our everyday lives. We exude You, we "ooze" the Spirit and people naturally come up to us - even if we're alone - and start asking us to pray for them. Or they become very uncomfortable in their own existence and want this "more" for themselves too. 

And You give it. Your Grace, Your Love is just that big. Bigger than we can possibly imagine.

And more. Much more.

Let's Go Now ... and See

Hubby was reading the Christmas story this morning before we opened our gifts. He reads it every year. Every year there is something, some word or phrase that jumps out at me.

This year it was in the account of the shepherds in Luke 2, after the angels left and they turned to one another, eyes still blinking in amazement, voices still tremulous in awe.

"Let's go now [to Bethlehem] and see this thing which has come to pass.." (vs 15)

They didn't need to wait for the weekly service.
They didn't want to wait for anything. 
They said, Let's go NOW."

NOW. No more waiting. No more wondering when the prophecy would be fulfilled. No more hoping. 

NOW. No more pining away wishing that God would show up. 
He showed up!

And what an arrival! 

It wasn't in a palace somewhere, definitely not where the sages went looking for Him. Angels gave shepherds - the guys looking after the Passover lambs on the hillside - the first announcement. 

Photo "Sleeping Baby" courtesy of
Dynamite Imagery at
www.freedigitalimages.net

The King of the Universe became a baby, born to parents too poor to bribe someone for a room in a crowded city. Instead, He was wrapped in swaddling bands (strips of cloth, like grave-clothes a mummy would wear), placed in a stone manger - a hole in the rock (looking much like someone in a tomb) - and surrounded by the smell of barnyard animals. 



This well-known image tells me that He is :

• Approachable - Jesus invites intimacy. (A newborn baby's eyes focus best at ten inches from its face, and respond most to facial features).
• Gentle and humble - Jesus does not strike terror, but inspires tenderness. He comes alongside and doesn't tower over us like some god to be placated or appeased.
• Vulnerable - Jesus became fully human and felt the things we feel. He knew what it was like to be hungry, to be rejected, to get angry, and to grieve. He also could experience compassion and joy and the love of friends. He knows how we feel. He DOES.
• Committed - He was in this for the long haul. It's one thing to talk about love but quite another to express it, to show it. And in coming to us to carry out the Plan, He showed His commitment to us. 

"Let's go NOW" - the shepherds said. In other words, "Let's not delay this. This is IMPORTANT." This - meeting the Creator - is the most important meeting in the Universe.

Let's go now ... and SEE..." It's not enough to talk about Him. It's not enough to go and hear someone else talk about Him. He must be SEEN - there must be a personal encounter. Once there is, it's LIFE-CHANGING. At the moment we realize for our own selves what He came to do for us - not us as a whole species but EACH of us, personally, privately, individually - that is the moment when the Sovereign Lord (Adonai) becomes Emmanuel (God with us). 

That is when Heaven comes down, when He is born inside of us. God WITH us. God IN us. We are regenerated, re-created. 

There is joy. There is peace. There is acceptance. There is LOVE.

Let's go NOW and SEE.

Unveiled

Lately I've been trying to fathom why it is that many unbelievers run screaming in the opposite direction when believers start talking about God. And especially about Jesus. At first glance it would seem to be self-evident - their hearts are unregenerate, after all, and they don't understand spiritual things.

However, I suspect it might be more than that. I suspect that they've been burned by believers whose entire reason for being seems to be following the rules and making sure that everyone else follows them too. Such believers consider themselves to be 'passionate' or perhaps even 'prophetic' or 'apostolic' ... with a message to convey regardless of how it's delivered. Such folks are often heard commenting on current events by saying that "disease X" is God's punishment for lawlessness, that a particular group of people is an abomination to God, or that a person or persons whose behavior has been reprehensible will "get theirs." This demonstrates a view of God that is very ummm ... Odin-like, shall I say. Lightning-bolts and all that. 

To the unbeliever, by the way, that's just plain weird ... and scary beyond all reason.

Holding views like this can feel very good to believers, even "right" ... because humans have an extremely well-developed sense of what's "fair." We want evil to be punished and good to prevail. We want things to fit into nice little pigeon-holes. This is right. That is wrong. There is no gray.

The problem is, there's a LOT of gray. 

I'm not saying there are no absolutes. What I'm saying is that there are fewer absolutes than we think. And something that WE might consider to be 'wrong' may just be 'different.' 

We believe the Bible. We read the same Word ... and yet its meaning is different for each one depending on who and what we believe God is. If we believe God to be a vindictive, judging, punishing, and lightning-bolt-throwing god, then we are going to read Scripture differently than if we believe Him to be loving, merciful, gracious, and forgiving. And our whole take on life will look like what we believe Him to be. 

Photo "Sun In The Sky" provided courtesy of
graur razvan ionut at
www.freedigitalphotos.net

This is what Paul was trying to get at when he said in 2 Corinthians 3 that when Moses is read, the veil is upon their hearts. And that when someone turns to the Lord, that veil is taken away. 

The veil is that mind-set of the avenging god, the one who must be appeased, the one of whom we must be afraid or he'll come down from on high and club us ... that one (we know this one so well; he thrives on our insecurities) who demands perfection and who is angry all the time because we never. measure. up. 

But Jesus. 

Jesus is different. Jesus isn't that vengeful god; He is merciful. Loving. Tender-hearted. Compassionate. And He opened the way to relationship with the Father the way it was meant to be - not in fearful cringing but in open-faced adoration, like a child lifting up its hands to a loving, gentle Daddy and saying, "Uppie!" 

In intimate relationship with Him, in gratitude for His love and forgiveness, that's how the veil comes off. The glory of the old covenant is outshone by the new. Love trumps hate. Mercy triumphs over judgment. Compassion dissolves condemnation. Forgiveness demolishes fear. 

We are unveiled by His love. Individually. We are allowed to gaze into His face - one on one - and be transformed by His grace. This is not because of anything we did or do, or because of any rule we obeyed or obey. It's because of His initiative. It's entirely His doing. 

We don't get to boast. We get to be loved. 

We don't change. We ARE changed ... by His Spirit and ONLY as we "behold Him" without the veil, without the veil of religious thinking - the same religious thinking that feels it has to defend His honor and charge in, commando-style, to take the world by force and MAKE it bow to Him. 

That's not God's style. Jesus has already given us everything we need. He's already removed the veil. 

So believe it - and behold Him.

Unveiled.

Air Craft

I was chatting with someone about the easy yoke, the light burden that Jesus promised. The idea was that a lot of folks make their burden heavier than Jesus intended by adding a lot of baggage to it - baggage that looks like, "If I just pray enough..." ... "If I just read the Word enough..."  "If I just go to church enough..." ... the ending of the sentence being, "... God will give me my heart's desire." (whatever that looks like: healing, revival, temporal blessing, a job, a spouse, a friend....) 

That's the thing though. This is where we fall apart. "If I just..." Do you hear it? That is EXACTLY the problem. We get this notion in our heads that if WE do something then GOD has to do something. 

We have it backwards. 

God already did something. All we do is say yes. There is nothing more simple than that. Nothing. And yet we complicate it ... put conditions on it ... and we try and try and try to get it right - and we fail, and fail ... and fail. 

Human effort will ultimately fail. There. That's about as simple as I can make it. The Christian life is not about us trying to live it. WE CAN'T. It's impossible to do on our own; if it were possible, there would BE no "New Testament." There would only be the Law. Keeping the rules. Toeing the line. What a drudge. What a burden!!

Jesus came to free us from that curse, that kind of automaton living. He came to give us abundant life. And that life is ONLY found in Him. Now, there are a lot of people who think that "in Him" means "toeing the line." It doesn't. It means that He has taken our "yes" to Him and He has enveloped us in His love, permeated and saturated us with His grace so full and free it's big enough to fly in!! As wide as the sky, His grace is more than we can imagine - (and let me tell you, I can imagine a LOT!) - and His supernatural power has given us everything that we need to fly in that Grace. To use the flying analogy to its maximum - His Grace is the air and the current; because of Jesus' once-for-all sacrifice, He has given us wings!

And a lot of us ... for far too long ... have tried and continue to try to make the Christian life function for us, based on a set of rules. Rules that we impose on ourselves (and on others) so that we can do the things we have been told we "should" be doing. In effect, we spend the vast majority of our time with our God-given wings folded neatly away behind our backs, working desperately on trying to build an airplane so that we can fly. 

How ludicrous is that! 

Photo "Eagle In Flight" courtesy of
Jeff Ratcliff at
www.freedigitalphotos.net

Those things we "should" be doing, by the way, are a natural product of resting on the currents of His grace with our wings spread wide to accept all that He so passionately longs to give us ... freely. 

They aren't goals to achieve, notches on our belt, or brownie points that will make God like us and bless us. 

He already loves us. He already has given us everything we need. No, those things we "should" be doing are end results. (Results are not goals. Hear me!) They are fruit that grow naturally and easily out of our relationship with Him. 

We don't love Him to have Him love us back; that's backward! (not to mention impossible...) We love Him because HE FIRST loved us. We don't talk to Him to get Him to "do stuff." We talk to Him because HE FIRST showed us that He loved us ... and talking to Him is a joy we GET to do because of His sacrifice. And we don't have to wait to do that until we are in some marble hall somewhere, but we get to talk to Him wherever we are. Whenever we want. As often (or as continuously) as we want. 

Ponder that. Because Jesus opened the Way, we GET to talk to the One who created the stars. To the One who calmed the tempest. To the One who loved us so much, as a friend recently put it, that He would rather die than live without us. 

And He actually did die so that He didn't have to live without us. What kind of crazy love is that!! 

Calvary's great price, paid for us, crafted us wings to fly; His grace, based on the sufficiency of that sacrifice, holds us up. 

That, dear friends, is "God with us." THAT is Emmanuel. Every moment. Scary, crazy, reckless  ...  and glorious.

Put down the tools and the blueprints for whatever aircraft you are trying to build. 

And spread your wings. 

Trust issues

I started thinking this evening, as I sat fretting about a mini-crisis we're having at the moment, about the expression "I have trust issues." 

And I do. I find it hard to trust people, to trust their motives. 

As I pondered why that is, why people state that they have "trust issues" (usually with an almost apologetic look on their faces) I thought of a reason that feels like one of those "duh" moments. 

People have trust issues because someone has hurt them in the past (maybe a lot of someones). They have learned not to trust. 

Not trusting means that you don't believe that the person (whoever it is) has your best interest at heart, and you believe that there is some sort of ulterior motive for offering to help you.

In some cases, that lack of trust is justified ... because of past experiences with that particular person. If there is a pattern of that individual abusing your trust, if there is a history of him or her continually using and abusing you (physically, emotionally, financially, even spiritually), then the lack of trust is perfectly appropriate. 

The problem is that after having been hurt like that by more and more people, especially over and over again by the people who have assured you over and over that they care - you tend to shy away from such assurances by people that have NOT proven that they can't be trusted. It becomes the default setting, the automatic reaction, the core belief. It's a defense mechanism designed to protect you from getting hurt again.

It's fear. When you boil it right down, it's fear.

I don't know about you, but I can even get like that with God. I catch myself saying, "What are You up to now?" to Him... not necessarily out loud or consciously, but it's that underlying belief that was hammered into me from the time I was little. That belief says that God is just waiting for me to mess up so He can clobber me. (Of course, most of us dress that up in theological terms, but what we really mean is that we believe that unless we toe the line, we're sunk.) 

But God is bigger than that. He loves. Unconditionally. This means that it doesn't matter whether we toe the line or not, He still loves us. He still watches over us. Not because of anything we do or don't do, but because He. Just. Does.

He was the One who took the initiative, He came, paid the debt in full, and wooed us by His Spirit ... and He rescued us. All we did was say yes to Him and He was all in, making an irrevocable covenant with us. (Romans 11:29 NASB - "For the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable.") 

Being afraid - being hesitant to step out and trust - that's going to happen. It's part of being human I guess. The Psalmist talked about that. He said in Psalm 56:3, "When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You." 

Not IF. No, WHEN. 

I used to read that verse to mean this: "Whenever I am afraid, I will grit my teeth and force myself to trust You." But that's not what the Psalmist said. He said, "I will." The thing of it is - the word "will" in the Bible often means "desire to" or "want to" right along with "shall." That means "When I am afraid, I will trust You because I want to."

Photo "Man Lying On
Chaise Lounge" by
Ambro at
www.freedigitalphotos.net

Why would he want to?  The key is ... well, I mentioned the key earlier. 

It's love. He loves us. He loves me. When I really, truly believe that He loves me, that He wants nothing but the best for me ... I will automatically want to trust Him - even if my circumstances are frightening. Or overwhelming.

It sounds so simple, doesn't it? It is. The concept is so uncluttered that it's easy to start looking around for the "catch." But there is none. The key to trust issues is knowing His love. The more I am convinced of His love, the easier it will be for me to want to - and to actually - trust Him. 

And yes ... it really is that simple - so simple that a child can understand it. It's just like sitting in a chair. You put your whole weight on it and rest. There's nothing less complicated than that.

Which is, I believe, why adults have such a hard time doing it. But that is another post for another time.

Spent

More and more the last few weeks I've been working hard and doing assignments and reading and studying, fretting about deadlines and schedules and making up time lost from work by going to school and making up lost study time by taking precious vacation time from work ... all to reach the culmination which happened tonight - nearly three hours of filling in black dots and writing short and long essays in words that are as alien and numbing to my personality as the dread long winter in Narnia before Aslan came to it. 

Photo "Snowy Morning" courtesy
of Evgeni Deniv at
www.freedigitalphotos.net

I'm spent. I've used up all my resources. I'm all in.

Work, even the work that I like, has lost its appeal. Everything is gray. I've kept going by repeating to myself, "Eyes on the prize," but more and more, lately, my heart has not been in it. 

Little things from all the different areas of my life: home, school, work, church, extended family, health concerns of those I love, and grief from what seems like a long string of deaths, tear at me. They erode my spirit, like those relentless droplets in the infamous Japanese water torture, hammer away at my heart and leave it hollow, washed out, fragmented, and useless. 

I feel drained. Used up. Desperately I seek for strength, for joy, for life. I woder how to get my life, my peace back. And then it hits me.

He was spent for me. He used up all His resources ... for me. He went all in - so I could be all in Him. He drained His life's blood for me. He was used up and spilled out ... for me. 

And in that realization of His love so strong that He would rather die than live without me, in this good news in and of itself, there is strength. There is joy. There is life.

The thrill that He loves me that much bubbles up inside like the sound of water gurgling under the ice in the winter - distant, yet there and growing stronger, fighting against the punishing, restraining, frozen deadness. It soothes, embraces, restores my soul. 

It breathes life into me. I can live again.